Plastic Frogs That Swim

Saturday was soccer day and although it's post Labor Day--it's still really freakin' hot outside and the kids wanted to know if we could go swimming after the game. Now, trying to explain to young children exactly why the pool is closed when in fact it IS still REALLY hot outside is like trying to explain to the Husband why it is necessary to clean the house even when we aren't expecting company. So after much complaining and exasperated sighs from the children the question was posed by the oldest of whether Miss Lynn's pool was closed also. Miss Lynn's pool (being in her backyard) was in fact NOT closed and after a phone call from Grammy (who is friends with Miss Lynn) we headed there to cool off.
The swimming went along uneventfully for a while (unless of course you count Sam's numerous attempts to drown himself--he cannot in fact actually swim but has completely convinced HIMSELF that he can and will insist (quite emphatically) that "I CAN swim!!" So after a while I get tired of arguing with him, let go of him and allow him to sink under the water for a bit thrashing wildly in a vain attempt to maneuver himself somewhere, then pull him up moments later only to have him triumphantly announce "SEE!! I CAN swim! I swim like Aquaman!!" Whatever. The child is delusional.)
Anyhoo--back to topic-after a while the girls (and another little boy that was there as well) start shrieking about there being a frog in the pool so I look and sure enough, there is a pretty decent sized frog swimming around in the pool. Now for some reason beyond my comprehension, a frog in a pool has some magical, magnetic attraction to my children so of course, they all begin to attempt to catch the frog. Emma succeeds and proudly holds the frog up by its' hind legs. The frog looks completely panicked and just hangs there motionless in an effort to play dead in the hopes that whatever has it will lose interest and let it go. So Emma decides she's going to throw the frog out of the pool and at this point I'm starting to question if she is suffering from heat stroke as it's not really her nature to actually pick up creepy, crawly, slimy things. So she starts to throw the frog, but apparently around this time the frog decides to change defensive tactics and begins thrashing wildly in her hand. At which point Emma realizes that the frog is alive, and not a fake plastic frog like she originally thought (you know she's blond, right?). So she's screaming, the frog is thrashing wildly, Liz is yelling "DROP IT!!! DROP IT!!!, Grammy's laughing, the dogs are barking. . . .

And I'm thinking why is there never a bottle of tequila around when you need it???